My son started middle school and had a half-day orientation this morning. I picked him up and took him to lunch. It went fine, I was hungry and able to find things to eat. Then he wanted to go to Cold Stone afterwards. Ice cream and I have an intimate relationship. Not only do I love it, but I also love tasting a million different flavors before deciding what my mood is for the day. It’s really not a ploy to get more ice cream (or maybe it is…). For whatever reason, it’s one of those foods that if I find the right combination it can brighten my whole day. I guess that’s a little crazy but it’s just the way it is.

So I didn’t have any. And I didn’t get to satisfy either love – no tasting all the flavors and no ice cream.

I’m kind of sad about it, I guess. At the same time, though, I really feel okay too. I know what it tastes like, really, and sometimes when I have it, the urge still exists for more. Almost as if I hadn’t had it. That sounds really crazy too, I guess. It’s hard to explain, but I think it ties into the concept of cravings being for something other than food, once we really stop to listen. So there’s some feeling that I get when I’m eating ice cream – something playful, I think, youthful, carefree, holiday-esque. Eating ice cream makes me feel that way, only for just an instant and then it’s gone. I’m left with the still present desire for playful, carefree sensations.

I got over it because it wasn’t a craving today. It was suggested by my son and part of me felt like I should have it too because, after all, we were celebrating his first day of middle school. The truth is that he doesn’t need me to have ice cream in order to celebrate his step closer to maturity. I was able to honor and support him in other ways today, ways that were hopefully more memorable than what flavor ice cream I might have had.

What did I eat today?

Breakfast: 2 eggs, zucchini, 1/4 avocado, sauerkraut , 1/2 a plantain

Pre-workout: 2 bites of an RX bar

Lunch: Salad / Steak / Grilled zucchini

Snack: 1/2 plantain, chunk of sweet potato

Super early dinner: Grass-fed beef sausage / Kiwi / Macadamia nuts and 2 dried apricots

Super hungry today even after a good lunch. Couldn’t tell if it was because I needed food or if it was mental. I opted for a little grace and just ate as I felt like my body was telling me. It’s an emotional day for me too and if it takes a few extra carbs to work through the day, then the ones I’m eating will keep me on the healthier spectrum.

And then I ended up having an early dinner because really I kept feeling hungry so the snack merged into dinner. Then suddenly I wasn’t anymore. It was as if a switch had been flipped and I was done.

Movement:

Down and dirty MetCon with a bunch of barbell work. Worked upper and lower body, got my heartrate way up, and I was dripping when it ended. All good.